2006: The Year of The Drunken Slut!

Ho, Ho, Ho, Ho!  No I’m not talking about good ole Santa Claus.  I’m referring to Britney Spears, Paris Hilton, Tara Reid, Nicole Richie, Lindsey Lohan, and the most recent inductee into the Hollywood Drunken Lesbo Slut Hall of Fame…Miss USA Tara Conner.

The recent antics of Miss USA Tara Conner who was caught red handed drunk, snorting cocaine while groping and sucking face with up and cumming drunken slut, Miss Teen USA Katie Blair has sparked an on air feud between Pagent Owner and Billionaire Real Estate mogul Donald Trump and Rosie O’Donnell who is co-host on the Estrogen filled Talk Show called “The View”.

The Donald forgave Conner of her sins and Miss USA will probably be making her first of many trips to rehab.  The war between Trump and Rosie is still heating up with threats of lawsuits and the stealing away of Rosie’s Lesbian wife. (Talk about sloppy seconds, ugh)

What ever became of the good old days when a woman was a lady in the living room and a slut in the bedroom?  Thanks to the Celebrity Slut Pack, those days are long gone.  One needs just to turn on the television and you can see exposed boobies and poonanies with no expression of shame or guilt.
Self proclaimed singer Britney Spears who gave credence to the term “White Trash with Money”, since her separation from couch potato hubby Kevin Fedderline has been partying like a Kennedy with gal pal Paris Hilton. Drinking, driving and showing off their “Hatchet Wounds” & “Hoe Cakes” by cleverly revealing that they “Forgot” their panties.  Every now and then, the duo allow Shakespeare wannabe Lindsey Lohan to hang with them as what appears to be their own little version of a court jester.

Lindsey Lohan recently bruised her thighs on a stripper pole, but is recovering quietly with friends and loved ones.

Speaking of bruised.  Lohan’s ego was recently beaten up over her drunken missive over the death of Liberal Leftist  Hollyweird Director Robert Altman and now it may appear that she has really gone over the edge by stalking failed presidential candidate and former sidekick to Bill “BJ” Clinton, Al Gore whom she would like to give her a “Image Makeover”.
I am truly sick and freaking tired of these tramps being referred to as “role models”.  Just recently Nicole Richie was arrested for driving while intoxicated on a busy expressway!  To top it off, she weighed in at a whopping 85 pounds!  Is it any wonder our daughters are coming home drunk and knocked up?

Thanks to these “Ladies”, the institution of marriage is nothing more then something to do when your bored.  MTV and E! television networks make this drunken and slutty behavior appear glamorous and fun, but then again Senator Ted Kennedy whose family gave birth to the term “Partying like a Kennedy” proved that if you have enough money and power, you can get away with anything you want to, up to and including murder.

I could really care less if these biatches kill themselves or even each other.  What I fear is what innocent bystander is going to be killed when these drunk hoes decide to drive while they are hammered on liquor and drugs?  If it were to happen, their daddies would just offer tons of cash to the victims families, offer an apology and go for a stay in rehab and all is well in their own little world.

To me, it seems that the only talent any of these young trollops has is drinking and schtupping.  I have not really witnessed any marketable skill or talent from any of them.

I can’t wait for the book that Britney Spears’ kids will write someday about their mother.  I predict it will be the next “Mommy Dearest” and worth reading.  Perhaps she could team with Michael Jackson and write a book on Child Rearing For Drunken Drug Addict Celebs.
How bout Miss USA Tara Conner?  15 yrs from now if she’s not still doing porno films, she will probably be stripping for cocaine in the Bill Clinton Presidential Library, Bar & Grill in Arkansas.

I have not a clue what will become of Paris Hilton and Nicole Richie.  Paris will always have mommy and daddy’s money to fall back on in between trips to rehab and the 15th season of “The Simple Life”.  Nicole Richie also has neither talent or looks.  Her daddy is a washed up has been.  She might actually have to get a job some day.

What ever will next year bring us?

2 responses to “2006: The Year of The Drunken Slut!

  1. Pingback: I was promised sluts “galore” but this is just a bunch of non sequiturs that spans only the last two months of ‘06 at PunkAssBlog.com

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