More TSA Three Ring Dog & Pony Show

The TSA who by the way could not find a terrorist if he was locked in a barn with Janet Nepalitano herself has  now decided they are going to SWAB your palms before you board a flight.

From CNN:

Washington (CNN) — To the list of instructions you hear at airport checkpoints, add this: “Put your palms forward, please.”

The Transportation Security Administration soon will begin randomly swabbing passengers’ hands at checkpoints and airport gates to test them for traces of explosives.

Previously, screeners swabbed some carry-on luggage and other objects as they searched for the needle in the security haystack — components of terrorist bombs in an endless stream of luggage.

But after the Christmas Day attempted bombing of Northwest Flight 253 over Detroit, Michigan, the TSA began a program of swabbing passengers’ hands, which could be contaminated by explosive materials, experts say. The TSA will greatly expand the swabbing in the coming weeks, the agency said.

“The point is to make sure that the air environment is a safe environment,” Homeland Security Secretary Janet Napolitano told CNN. “We know that al Qaeda [and other] terrorists continue to think of aviation as a way to attack the United States. One way we keep it safe is by new technology [and] random use of different types of technology.”

If a Muslim terrorist were to think this through, they would simply have someone else make the bomb and help the Seeker of Muhammad’s 72 Virgins put the bomb on, thus not allowing him to touch the bomb…So unless the Jihadi wannabe cannot keep his hands off his schlong, there will be no residue on his hands…..DUHHHHHHHHHH!

Now if these dumb fucks of the TSA want to Swab my Schlong, I’d be more then happy to whip Stanley the Power Tool out and allow them to test it for explosives or anything else they wish to test for, and while they’re at it, they can Swab my asshole too!

Personally, I think we should give every passenger on a plane a baseball bat, that way if 4 terrorist want to take on an entire plane, the passengers can beat the living shit out of the goat fucking asshole and send him on a one way magic carpet ride to his cartoon like prophet Muhammad and the 72 virgin sheep.

Airport Security Nazis Strike Again

The fucknuts of the TSA have once again saved the American people from a stealthy domestic disabled person from traveling with his leg braces!

From Philly.Com:

Just when I thought I was out of the Transportation Security Administration business for a few columns, they pull me back in.

Did you hear about the Camden cop whose disabled son wasn’t allowed to pass through airport security unless he took off his leg braces?

Unfortunately, it’s no joke. This happened to Bob Thomas, a 53-year-old officer in Camden’s emergency crime suppression team, who was flying to Orlando in March with his wife, Leona, and their son, Ryan.

Ryan was taking his first flight, to Walt Disney World, for his fourth birthday.

The boy is developmentally delayed, one of the effects of being born 16 weeks prematurely. His ankles are malformed and his legs have low muscle tone. In March he was just starting to walk.

Unfortunately the only people the TSA treat like terrorists are law abiding citizens…The real terrorists get a free pass out of fear of offending the Muslim population.  The TSA are nothing more then bumbling eunichs playing Starsky & Hutch in their little Die Hard 2 fantasy world, simply a bunch of bullies!

In the meantime, if you’re on a terror watch list and stapping a bomb to your nuts…You are allowed to fly without any problem.